Caring for the carer? 

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Written by an adoptive parent

Supporting special needs in my family can be so very hard, where we can easily neglect ourselves due to all the pressures of keeping the wheels on everyone else.

I write this as I have seen recently the effects that secondary trauma has had on my own body where it can take its toll on us in so many ways, which really makes everything so much harder.

This year a friend bought me a face pack which sat on my shelf… where I was pushed to use it by said lovely friend. In doing such a simple thing it made me feel topped up, firstly that someone had thought of me and secondly how I realised how little time I make for myself and how I need to change this!

I am not one for new year resolutions but this year I really hope that I can find some time to ‘put myself on pause and do things for me’, to invest in the engine that drives the car that needs to keep its wheels on!

Here’s where I have started by writing a list of the things I used to like to do…. I had lost sight of the simple things I can change: 

  • ‘sit in the garden with a cup of tea before everyone wakes up’,
  • ‘find time to have a coffee with a friend’,
  • ‘get out my bike and give it a service!’, ‘
  • buy some lovely bubble bath salts and have a soak in the daytime with no children in the house!’
  • book a hair appointment’,
  • ‘ask my husband out for a lunch date and then re-book it (this could work well for a friend too)’. 

Here’s a couple of things that I have been researching about that might help others…..

What are the signs of a vitamin deficiency?
General vitamin deficiency symptoms include:

  • Tiredness
  • Being prone to infections
  • Headaches
  • Bleeding gums
  • Very dry skin and cracked lips
  • Brittle hair and nails
  • A swollen and inflamed tongue
  • Digestive disorders like diarrhoea

Source: https://www.livi.co.uk/your…/what-vitamins-should-i-take/

Did you know the NHS offer a FREE Health Check?
If you’re aged 40 to 74 and do not have a pre-existing health condition, you should be invited to an NHS Health Check by your GP or local council every five years.

If you think you are eligible but have not been invited, contact your GP surgery to find out if they offer NHS Health Checks or contact your local council to find out where you can get an NHS Health Check in your area. Some pharmacies also offer NHS Health Checks.
Find out what the health check involves here: https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/nhs-health-check/

Good Mental Health Tips: Some great bitesize videos from the Mental Health Foundation on how to consider finding time for pause….

Source: FASD Hub South West adoptive parent